Sunday, November 20, 2011

About a Princess.....

Once upon a time in a land far far away deep down south of the mason Dixon line, lived a southern princess named Pearl. (seen above) Pearl wasn’t quiet and demure like the rest of the up and coming debutantes.  It’s not that she meant to crash through her family’s castle; swinging from the crystal chandeliers, crashing and smashing through life.  no, this princess wanted to do the right things, but her love of ketchup kept her hands sticky, her passion for home restoration kept her pocket purse empty, and her admiration for hot pink CA. 1984 shimmering lip gloss still holds a special place in Pearls heart (and purse) even today. 

Pearl was raised by a true blue steel magnolia , who indoctrinated her children with all the necessary rules:
                                             When I say jump, you say “How high?”
                                           A child is to be seen, NOT heard….ever…
                                          We live by golden rule in this castle…
                                         meaning the one with the GOLD rules.
                                                 A lady always suffers in silence.
                                                    And, whatever you do…
                                          don’t ever put your “news in the streets.”

Pearl didn’t always follow the rules. Even though she wanted to be a bonafied  princess, the very idea seemed… what’s the word ….ummmm….. ok. I got it.  Boring. 
Exasperated and shaken but never defeated, the Matriarch bestowed the moniker Flibbertigibbet for her lil princess.  Though it was not given as a sweet lil love nick name, it came out more in the fashion of:
“Why don’t you slow down???? You’re supposed to be a lil princess but instead you flit here, and flit there, you’re just a !!$$##^^!!! Flibbertigibbet!”
It wasn’t until I was 40, that I actually bothered to look the word Flibbertigibbet up:
Flib-ber-ti-gib-bet. n
A silly, scatterbrained, or garrulous person.
Synonyms: bird brain, cuckoo, ditz, featherbrain, featherhead, nitwit, rattlebrain.
Geeeeee thanks, mom. 
Shaken but never defeated, The Matriarch sent her lil princess to fine private schools.  Unfortunately, the only subject she studied was “How to stare out the window 101” and the only papers she wrote with passion were the love letters she meticulously composed to her 8 year old crush, Ricky Schroder. This princess was given all the tools to a produce a fairy tale life; beautiful cars, endless supply of designer clothes, and an open ended credit card for lunching with the princesses.  She was taught how to cook fine meals for her once upon a time prince and can set the table with standards set forth by Emily Post herself.  Pearl was never one to murder the Queens English nor did she have any odd tics (that we’re aware of.)  You see, the matriarch had it all planned…
Flibbertigibbet was brought up to live a fairy tale life, it was her destiny. 
Consequently, I grew up, got married, and now bask on our 50 foot yaught (parked outside our ocean front  castle popping chocolate bon bons and basking my size 0 bod while, Rauel, my house boy, trims my toe nails (with his bare teeth) all the while purring and feeding me fat free grapes. 
                                            Do you see me? I’m waving!!!!
You know what they say.....when dreams turn to dust, vacuum.
With this said, and after scrapes and burns; tosses and turns, I have finally learned that
                                    we all have to paint our own fairytale life
                                     and we all can make our own set of rules:
                                                       Life is short ~ Live it!
                                                   Drink only your fine wine
                                                  Sip from your best crystal
                                                  Burn your scented candles
                                      And most importantly, whatever you do,
                                            In the words of Winston Churchill,
                                       NEVER, NEVER, NEVER GIVE UP!

This blog is intended to be place for encouragement, inspiration and of course…
the random musings of goofy single momma!!! So if you’re the average every day princess turned grocery cart pushing, baby burping, corporate climbing, searching for her tiara ~ but probably drove over it this morning in her mini van Princess, stick around! Princesses come in all shapes and sizes; it’s just depending… if you are: Co dependent, French fry dependent, Prince Charming dependent or As The World Turns dependent;  just depending on the day wine box dependent…let this blog be a soft place for you to land. 

We were never made to be Stinkerella with our stinking thinking, cause sista, being a peasant just ain’t pleasant!  We were born and bred for bigger diamonds and sassier tiaras.  So if you think this blog may pertain to you, kick off those glass slippers, (or rubber crocs) and grab a latte, (or a glass of bubbly) and stay a while….

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